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No landscape ever made me cry
16mm film, B&W, silent
05:30
2025
Talking about crying is not easy for me, who is a crier. If I cry before someone, that means my language breaks down, and my tears make everyone, including myself, feel awkward. I observe that many people explain themselves after crying, like I do, trying to justify their tears.
If crying is a mode of communication, the interpretation seems too broad. Unless the tears are caused by physical pain or shock, tears seem to be too closely linked to emotion, especially after we reach a certain age—this may be the reason why crying instantly brings certain discomfort.
While developing the work, I started writing about my tears and the act of crying. When I went back and read it, it seemed too revealing, so I dismantled the text and turned it into fragments. “Unproblematic” tears I can think of are when a baby is born (in this case, not crying is a problem), or “holy tears.” Holy tears are not to be hidden or explained, but they create meanings by revealing themselves. Most photographs or pictures that depict crying either reveal the tears in plain sight or hide them away.
This film is a process of trying to hold back tears, as words break down and turn into crying, and of trying to explain the tears. This is also about an ambivalent attitude: being personal, but also an attempt to keep a distance from personal emotions, as well as wanting to talk about crying but not being able to.
*A digital scan of the 16mm film is available for exhibition and screening.
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